Comedians Kate Berlant and Jacqueline Novak on the Therapeutic Energy of Friendship — Interview
Novak: I feel the joke of our friendship dynamic is anxious-avoidant. Kate is anxious about getting lunch dates on the books, which makes me avoidant. She feels me resisting and he or she goes tougher to lock down the lunch. [But] Poog has solved any points round that dynamic as a result of Kate is now inbuilt to my week.
Berlant: Let’s simply say I textual content you one thing and you do not reply. I am high quality.
Novak: You understand I like you. You understand it is coming.
Berlant: I do know if I am having a breakdown or a full factor, you may be there. If I textual content you one thing and also you don’t textual content again, I am not like, “Bitch!”
Novak: I attempt to talk to folks that if it is an emotional emergency, inform me, after which I will be on immediately. I am going to drop every thing. It is complicated when it is all blended collectively and each textual content or cellphone name is given this identical weight of obligation. I additionally hold coming again to, as an grownup, if it isn’t understanding naturally with somebody, why keep it? We’re not trapped in a faculty system.
Berlant: The shared understanding of one another’s limits and an encouragement not to withstand them. I am not even certain I needs to be saying this, however…yesterday I used to be microdosing on mushrooms and was getting very moved by my friendship with Jacqueline.
Novak: She’s mendacity round being moved.
Berlant: I FaceTimed her being like, “If she does not choose up, that is utterly high quality.” When she picked up, I used to be so overwhelmed with pleasure.
Novak: I consider you have been on the ground, writhing between cat and cow [poses]. I feel a friendship is sort of like an area that you just occupy with somebody. We have now our room. And we do sure issues in our room.
Berlant: That could be a fucking genius approach to strategy all relationships. We want totally different rooms for various individuals!
Novak: I suppose the podcast is us broadcasting from the room, a room with skincare and books blended in with equal enthusiasm. In case you have been simply my important principle pal, that would not be as enjoyable.
Berlant: [Laughs] That’s a part of Poog. It permits us to speak about existential crises, whereas being anchored within the uncomplicated and unintellectual actuality of serum.